My Blog, my journey… or something like that :o)

I think we are familiar with the procedure called CPR (cardio pulmonary resuscitation). It’s usually what we see in movies during emergency cases that the doctors would pump the chest of the patient (errr…dying) and blow air through the mouth. CPR is described to combine rescue breathing (one person breathing into another person) and chest compression in a lifesaving procedure performed when a person has stopped breathing or a person’s heart has stopped beating. Other names for CPR is cardiac resuscitation, mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, kiss of life, breath of life

I recently underwent CPR. It all happened last Saturday (15 July 2006) when my week was a mixture of pressures: a disapproved travel request in work, 3-book review assignment in school, and a major family concern between mom, her siblings and my grandmother. I felt my heart was tightening and I was losing breath…. My body needed air, my mind was screaming for space and my soul is hungry for peace… I realized I needed a CPR…

After my class last Saturday, decided to avail of the Sacrament of Reconciliation. It was the grace that I really prayed for. I was in that state where I can no longer deny to myself that one MAJOR reason why I was experiencing chaos is because I was not at peace with myself and my God. The load that I was carrying was so heavy from the heartaches from relationships, pressures from work, school and home… and the remorse and guilt I was feeling because of the sins I committed… I was spiritually dead, physically tired and emotionally exhausted!

I convinced myself to go to confession since earlier that day I decided to go the spa for pampering and detoxifying, thinking that I should first flush out the toxics of my soul. It was a very fruitful experience; I was able to get a very good advice from the priest. After the confession, I headed for the spa to treat myself for the soul-worthy move. I had the sauna and steam bath for all for myself which gave me time to relax and reflect about things. The massage was one of the best I had in my life! To complete my whole process of detoxifying, I bought Fibrosine in order to flush out the toxics from my digestive system. TV has a little appeal to me that night so I decided to sleep early.

The following day I got out of bed feeling re-energized… revitalized… relieved… physically but most of all spiritually. The whole “detoxifying” experience breathed in new air in my being, performing what it needed that time…a very good CPR for my mind, body and soul. It was a time for me to gather myself through solitude and prayer. To put my concerns at the feet of Jesus as I reconcile myself with Him. It required me to humble myself before my God and ask for forgiveness as well as beg for the gift of peace.

In our life, there will always be time that we will feel tired from our daily routine… be affected of the negative energies surrounding us, take in the toxics that the world is throwing in our face. That’s reality and that’s life. But what is important is on HOW we cope up with these situations. Some would do some shopping, go on a trip, others resort to drink alcohol and even take in drugs — the choice range from the simplest to the most complicated.

Life is sometimes a sad reality. And part of that reality is also the fact that there are times that we falter to stay positive and courageously stand and walk on our journey toward holiness. But despite our failure, the Lord understands our weakness that is why He is encouraging us through Isaiah 40:31:

But those who hope in Yahweh renew their strength. They put on wings like eagles, they run and do not grow weary, walk and never tire.

My brothers and sisters, let us hold on to the Lord’s promise of carrying us through times of difficulties and trials… God is always willing to help us in carrying our load if we will be humble enough to put our yoke on Him. He assures us that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Let it be our prayer that in time of difficulties, we continue cling to God… for Him to continually purify our heart, rekindle our spirit as we humbly ask for the grace to live life to its fullness.

In our times of chaos, stress, disorder, exhaustion, despair, disappointments, trouble and pain, let’s check if we need a CPR as we Contritely (humbly) Pray for Renewal.